Samuel Amegavisa is getting nervous. In his last year of human biology
studies at the University of Cape Coast in Ghana, it’s time to start
thinking about job interviews.
“My situation is quite simple. I have never been interviewed before,”
wrote 23-year-old Amegavisa in an email to BBC Capital. He had a basic
question — one most of us probably don’t think much about. “Is there any
recommended sitting position before and during your interview?”While everyone knows it’s important to dress smartly for an interview, less obvious — and less known— is the importance of how you carry yourself. What hidden cues do you give when you walk through the doorway, shake hands or sit?
Three body language experts share their insights on what moves to make, and avoid, in an interview.
Everyone knows it’s important to dress smartly for an interview. Less obvious is the importance of how you carry yourself.
Happy medium
The first contact between an interviewer and interviewee is almost always a handshake. First impressions often determine how the rest of the interview goes, so this can be one of the most important elements of getting it right, according to David Alssema, a body language expert and training facilitator with Paramount Training & Development in Perth, Australia.
“Rapport is built by similarities,” so shake hands the way the interviewer does, recommended Alssema in an email. “Matching the strength or greeting shows you want to be an equal. Overpowering a handshake can signal a dominant attitude towards the meeting.”
Zones of space
No matter our culture, we all have and are at least subconsciously aware of four zones of space around us. They are (from farthest to closest): Public, social, personal and intimate. It’s important to be keenly attuned to these during an interview, according to Nick Morgan, Boston-based speech coach and author of Power Cues: The Subtle Science of Leading Groups, Persuading Others, and Maximizing Your Personal Impact. “The only significant things that happen between people happen in personal and intimate space,” he wrote in an email. “Since intimate space is off limits [in an interview], you want to get into the personal space of the interviewer,” if you want the person to be inclined to decide in your favour.
Make your move
While the handshake brings us into the personal space that we want — it’s why we do it, according to Morgan — typical seating arrangements in an interview tend to move us away. “That makes it easier for the interviewer to pass on us — but harder for us to make an impression,” he said. “So look for ways to tactfully move into the personal space of the interviewer.” For example, you might move your chair slightly or sit on the same side of a round table.
Once you’re seated, consider other ways to close the distance. Lean forward, for example, just not too much. “Try to do this tactfully and subtly, not rapidly or awkwardly,” cautioned Morgan. It’s worth the effort.
“We increase trust and connection with people when we close the distance between us, even by small amounts,” he said.
Open for business
It’s very important to keep your body language “open,” according to Morgan. You’re likely to be nervous and you might find yourself unconsciously clutching your hands in front of you or folding your arms. “These feel safe and comfortable, but also distancing and disconnecting for the other party,” he said. In addition, “[folding your arms] shows that you are disinterested, and it also prevents you from leaning,” said Alssema.
The eyes have it
“Eye contact is important, and any less or any more than a reasonable amount may indicate other attitudes,” said Alssema. What’s just right? That might be hard to tell in some situations, but Alssema suggests mirroring the amount of time the interviewer gives you eye contact. If there is a panel of interviewers, it’s important to provide the right mix of time for each person. “Respond to each person individually with eye contact when answering questions,” he said. “Glancing around is a signal for boredom, so avoid it if possible.”
People often make the mistake of equating good eye contact with never looking away — but this would be a mistake, too, according to Atlanta, Georgia-based Patti Wood, a body language expert and author of SNAP Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language, and Charisma.
“It is normal to look away from time to time as you speak, because you’re accessing information in your brain,” she wrote in an email. Just don’t let yourself drift off when the interviewer is speaking. “After giving an answer, remember to make eye contact and listen to the interviewer. Eye contact sends the message that you are serious and engaged,” Wood said.
Don’t forget to breathe — deeply
The moment people get nervous, the more quickly they start breathing. That can wreak havoc in an interview.
“When you take quick shallow breaths, you reduce your ability to think clearly,” said Wood. “This may keep you from answering questions quickly and succinctly.”
Instead, try to breathe deeply from low down in your belly. “[It is] one key to feeling clearheaded, energised, and confident,” she said. “Practice breathing more slowly, using your diaphragm, belly, rib cage and lower back in the process.” Of course, this isn’t something you’ll want to do in your actual interview. “But try it whenever you get anxious and certainly before your interview,” she said.
Courtesy of bbc/capital
Can your body language win you the job?
If a boss asks you to do something that is not in your job description once, you might feel you have no choice but to do it.
Inappropriate bosses are everywhere.
A
one-off request, perhaps you do as a favour, not even giving it a
second thought. But what if it becomes a pattern? One day, it’s an
emergency dry cleaning drop-off, the next it’s picking up his kids at
soccer or taking out the rubbish. At what point are such requests
inappropriate?
The problem with these favours, sadly, is that
often they aren’t isolated. “If a boss does this, it is likely [he or
she] will violate professional boundaries in other ways as well, so this
probably isn't the only challenge you'll have in this job,” wrote Janet
Scarborough Civitelli, an Austin, Texas-based workplace psychologist
and career coach, in an email.
Putting it into context
How do you decide whether something is OK?
“Context
is everything,” said Philadelphia-based talent management consultant
Mary Schaefer in an email. “It depends on your relationship and the
pattern of behaviour so far. First, do you want to do it? Second, does
it appear your boss has no other choice than to ask you? Third, what
are the probable consequences for you if you don't?”
Where to draw the line
Don’t
think this is a problem of just certain companies. It’s an issue at
both large and small firms, according to Scarborough Civitelli.
“Inappropriate bosses are everywhere,” she said.
It’s crucial to
establish boundaries and draw the line early on. Scarborough Civitelli
suggested saying something along the lines of: "I want to be helpful,
but I think we may have different expectations...Can we please discuss
it so that we can get in sync about what my job entails?"
The more you can keep the conversation friendly and unemotional, the
better it should go. “Either you'll arrive at a mutually agreeable
decision or you will find out that this job requires something that
makes you uncomfortable and then you'll have to weigh the pros and cons
of seeking other employment,” Scarborough Civitelli said.
Offering up plan B
“You
can draw the line wherever you want,” said Schaefer. “If you don't want
to do [something], and you think you would lose your job if you say no,
but you are not ready to leave, you have a decision to make. [You]
might agree in the moment, follow through, and then strategise as to how
to follow up so it doesn't happen again.”
If your supervisor is a
reasonable person, you might offer to brainstorm alternatives or even
help them make other arrangements, suggested Schaefer who is a firm
advocate of discussing expectations — no matter how trivial or unusual
they may seem — early on “while the relationship is amiable and stable,
and there is no current hot topic.”
In many cases, bosses may not
even realise that they have overstepped their boundaries. Dr Lorraine
Tilbury, founder of personal and professional development firm
HorsePower International based in France’s Loire Valley, said that one
time her husband asked the woman who they had employed to clean their
house to shine his shoes. The woman refused and explained to him that
she was a cleaning lady, not a servant.
“He had no idea that she
would react that way to his request,” said Tilbury. “But he understood
and never asked her again to do it. Very often the requestor doesn't
even realise that they've crossed a boundary until you tell them.”
Included
in any discussion should be your job description. “If the boss is iffy
about that, draw it out of them,” said Schaefer. “Ask questions like:
What did the person in this role before me do? What did they do that you
want to make sure is continued? And, what is one thing you would change
about this job now that there is a new person in it?”
A paper trail
But
don’t stop there. Draft up a paragraph based on your discussion. Send
it via email, and include a note: "Here is how I would summarise what I
heard about what you expect of my role. If there is anything I didn't
represent accurately or left out, please let me know,” said Schaefer.
By documenting it, you’ll have it to refer back to if you ever need
it. “Reasonable humans hate to contradict themselves,” she said. Plus,
said Schaefer, it can really reinforce your point. “When I was a human
resources manager, it was amazing to me how often employees would not
‘hear’ feedback about performance until they ‘saw’ it on paper,” she
said. “It’s something about how the brain works, and it works equally
well when you are trying to get on the same page with your supervisor.”
Getting nowhere
If your boss continues to be unresponsive,
it could be worth it to get a second opinion from someone you trust,
suggested Schaefer. “You don't have to tell the whole story, but perhaps
engage a boss you respected in the past who can give you guidance as
when to escalate,” she said.
If your concerns continue to fall on
deaf ears with your current boss and you keep getting outlandish
requests, then going to your human resources department might be your
next option. Just make sure to keep your documentation handy, said
Schaefer.
Regional differences
In some
countries, boundaries are not so cut and dry, especially with
family-owned and smaller businesses. “[In Asia] sometimes going above
and beyond what you were hired to do can be the norm,” said Steven
Yeong, a recruiter coach at Hof Consulting in Singapore, in an email.
“Often, the marketing or sales directors may have to pick up the boss’s
kids from soccer practice,” he said. “It can quite hard for the
subordinate to say ‘no’ to her superior even with lots of diplomacy and a
soft-soft approach.”
In these cases, Yeong has seen many employees quit rather than approach their bosses.
But in France, boundaries tend to be clearer with the introduction of
the 35-hour work week a decade and a half ago. “[It] has obliged small
business owners to ensure that their employees paid by the hour do focus
primarily on their direct job responsibilities in order to avoid
excessive overtime hours,” said Tilbury. It’s not that unusual requests
don’t happen; it is just easier to turn them down.
Choosing the right path
It’s
important to trust your instincts, said Tilbury. If something doesn’t
feel right, then it probably isn’t. “Once you determine the boundary
that needs to be re-instated, communicate constructively and as quickly
as you can what your boundary is to the person involved,” she said.
“Waiting to discuss it will increase your level of frustration and
anger, and that can lead to an unconstructive explosion in the long run.
That's why it's important to communicate it as quickly as you can.”
Courtesy BBC Capital
That’s not my job!
When Formula One driver Derek Bell stepped into a race car and switched on the ignition, life's distractions melted away.
Bell,
who raced from 1968 to 1996 for teams including Ferrari and McLaren,
would think of nothing for the next few hours but tire pressure, how
much gas he had left, and how the car felt going into a turn. Nothing
but the track.
“The experience of being totally committed, being
totally into every detail of driving, it’s like a Zen experience,”
recalled Bell, a native of Britain now living in Boca Raton, Florida.
“You never get a chance to lose your concentration because driving takes
every ounce of it.
The focus Bell experienced in his race car, of
being so committed to the moment at hand, can equal success in business
too. These days it’s called living in the moment or being mindful. And
while mindfulness might sound like management speak, research shows
having an intense focus on a particular task — rather than multitasking —
can make you more productive and effective at work.
As a manager,
it means creating ways to help your staff intensely focus on their
work, said Michael Chaskalson, an author and mindfulness expert. “It’s
about managing your attention and the attention of your staff to the
present moment,” Chaskalson said.
Since living in the moment isn’t
something that’s taught in most schools, Chaskalson recommends training
programs on mindfulness, usually eight-week sessions that incorporate
everything from meditation-based breathing techniques to
neuroscience-based methods to improve focus and productivity. The
companies that do this already include Apple, Deutsche Bank, General
Mills and Google.
Working mindfully means giving up on the idea of
multitasking, said Theresa Glomb, professor of organisational behaviour
at the University of Minnesota’s Carlson School of Management. That’s
right: the idea of doing a bunch of things at once is a great recipe for
doing a bunch of things poorly, with none of them getting the full
attention they deserve. “This leaves managers in a constant state of
distraction,” Glomb said.
Consider that open-door policy many managers today have strived to adopt. While it promotes creativity by allowing a manager to be more accessible,
the downside is constant interruptions, making focusing on work
difficult. Instead, Glomb suggested that managers create office hours,
like university professors. If that doesn’t work, simply ask the
employee to come back at a later time that suits you — and your work.
When
it’s impossible to ignore an interruption, Glomb recommends keeping
track of where you were. Quickly jot down three ideas about the task and
what you were about to do next so you can seamlessly pick up again
where you left off.
Living in the moment also means setting
routines, Glomb said. Start your day by prioritising your work load. Big
or difficult tasks should be handled first thing, when your attention
is at its most acute. As for emails and less important meetings, save
them for later in the day. And, before leaving work, make tomorrow’s “to
do” list or open documents you need to work on the next morning.
“Mindfulness
doesn’t need to be sitting on a cushion and meditating,” Glomb said.
“Sometimes it’s just about pausing and reflecting and thinking about
your next direction.”
Bell, the two-time World Sportscar Championship and five-time LeMans
winner, remembers when thinking about his next move meant keeping
himself alive. It was like that in France in 1995 during a rainy 24
Hours of LeMans, the endurance race with three drivers taking turns
behind the wheel. Bell was about to head into the pits to switch drivers
when his crew came on the radio. His replacement was too tired and
couldn’t take over. Bell had to continue.
“The attention needed
to drive in the rain all night long, it was intense,” recalled Bell,
whose team finished third that year. “You either needed to have all your
focus or you would be in trouble.”
That was easier for Bell, a
seasoned veteran, than younger drivers. At first, drivers struggle with
all the dials and knobs in a cockpit, constantly monitoring the gas, and
always being worried about how the brakes feel.
“When you start,
everything is compartmentalized, and you always have to go through a
mental checklist,” Bell said. “All these things come naturally as you
get older, and you start just doing things without thinking of it
because you’ve honed that attention.”
Imagine then as a manager
doing the same thing: every task in front of you gets nothing but your
complete focus — and then your complete confidence as well.
courtesy of BBC_Capital.
The multitasking myth
Due tomorrow? Oh, I’ll start tonight
If you’ve already done your holiday shopping or prepared next year’s
tax returns, you can congratulate yourself for being so organized. Most
of us are more likely to wait until the 11th hour to get that last bit
of shopping done — and wait until the last possible moment to complete a
project that’s coming due.
Why do we put off the inevitable? Is it busyness, laziness, the need
for the adrenalin rush, fear of failure, or a combination of factors?
We turned to question-and-answer site Quora to find out how to get over the bad habit of procrastinating. Here’s what respondents had to say about delaying tactics.
Par for the course
“We live in a society that is totally bombarded with distractions all the time,” wrote Shaz Hasan.
“And now thanks to the internet, ‘we create more content in 48 hours
than we did from the dawn of civilization up until 2003’, according to
Eric Schmidt CEO of Google. That’s A LOT of YouTube videos, blog posts,
Facebook statuses, and tweets that will distract you every day.”
Nikant Vohra
calls procrastination perfectly normal. “Most of the people in the
world procrastinate from time to time,” he said. “Sometimes it is for
small things like cleaning the house, buying groceries, washing clothes
etc. But most of the time, it is for things that are very important for
life like going to the gym, completing the exam preparation or paying
your bills.”
Why do we do it? Vohra cites three reasons:
- Overestimating our own abilities: “A
lot of us overestimate our own abilities of completing a piece of work
on time. Not only this, we overestimate that how motivated we will be in
the future to complete the work at hand …We all come up with a lot of
excuses to avoid work. Too busy. Too tired. Too broke. Sometimes these
excuses make sense. But most of the time they are like a safety blanket
to protect you from doing some real work.”
- Too many distractions:
“In this advanced age of technology, we have a lot of distractions in
life which do not allow us to do real work. How can a person prepare for
an exam when he has 30 pending requests of Candy Crush Saga on his
Facebook page? How can he go to gym when he has to answer hundreds of
emails? Most of us have become slaves to these distractions.”
- Self doubt and fear: “When we are unsure of how to tackle a project or insecure in our abilities, we might find ourselves putting it off in favour of working on other tasks. We tell ourselves that ‘one day’ we will be ready to make a change, or take a chance; that ‘one day’ the timing will be better, our confidence stronger, our circumstances easier. But that one day never comes.”
Recognising the problem
Why
we procrastinate is often determined by the task at hand. “We use our
conscious mind to decide what's important to us, and then we set up
ideals that we know we should follow — write that first page, take that
hour to go workout, finish reading that book, make that phone call, cook
that good meal. These are our should-haves,” wrote Paul Winslow. “But then our actions expose very different priorities. In fact, our actions expose our real priorities. Our must-haves.”
“The
key is absolutely in how we associate the things we do with our pain
and pleasure signals in the brain,” he continued. “Pleasure comes in
many forms: excitement, fun, warm, relaxing. And pain has many shades of
its own: boredom, fear, frustrating, uncomfortable.”
I am a procrastinator
Admitting
you are a procrastinator goes a long way to finding a solution. “I've
struggled with procrastination all my life,” wrote Douglas Stewart.
To combat that, Stewart breaks task into what tiny “doable”chunks.
“Then I put an egg timer on my desk and set it for a reasonable amount
of focused work time (usually 50 minutes). I shut off all distractions.”
Meanwhile, Pedro Teixeira
faces his biggest issue: fear. “I found that my main source of
procrastination was fear,” he wrote. “I simply feared failure and
rejection. I was stuck on doing preliminary and preparatory work
forever, causing anxiety…I had to face it and start actually working. My
new motto is ‘stop trying to do it and do it.’”
Procrastination
also can be a response to boredom. “Procrastination around certain tasks
is indication that I don't (internally) really want to do then,” Heron Weston
wrote. “Then, I either have to accept them or try to change them.
Either way, I make that choice and I am responsible for the way it turns
out. I find this feeling of personal power extremely motivating.
Getting out of the hole
The
problem with procrastination is that it can feed onto itself. “The more
time you invest in procrastinating, the easier it is to find more
distractions and continue on procrastinating,” Hasan wrote. “So by
procrastinating more and more, you’re simply digging yourself a deeper
hole, a hole that will be ultimately impossible to get out of.”
To
break the cycle, Hasan suggests removing your attention from the
distraction, physically and mentally. “Switch it off, close the browser
and do whatever you have to do in that moment to remove yourself from
the activity that is resulting in you procrastinating,” he wrote. “Do
whatever it takes to remove yourself from your environment temporarily.
Jose Ricaro Rosado Cruz
suggests improving productivity by working in short bursts, listing
your “to dos” and turning off your mobile phone and internet connections
at work. “Begin by completing your most urgent task. Notice I say
urgent, not important. Urgent means that it has less time to be
completed,” he wrote.
The feel good factor
Some respondents said the hardest part of any task is getting started. Sara Wedeman, who wrote her doctoral dissertation on procrastination, wrote: “It's not just a question of avoiding doing something that is frustrating,
difficult, and anxiety provoking: the mere anticipation of frustration
prevents the procrastinator from even starting…Once that tipping point
(pain of not doing exceeds pain of doing) is crossed, and they actually
begin the task, they are often shocked to discover it was never that bad
at all.”
Psychologist Bruce Neben
says the feeling of relief at accomplishing the task can outweigh the
anxiety that led to the procrastination in the first place. “At those
rare times when you have actually done the thing which you have
procrastinated about, there is a feeling of relief — a good feeling, to
get that thing done so you don't have to worry about it anymore,” Neben
wrote. “Make it a policy to ALWAYS do the hardest task FIRST. You will
probably find that it doesn't take as long as you think it will, and it
leaves lots of time to do the easy things, leaving you in a better
mood.”
Courtesy: BBC Capital
How to stop procrastinating
Yep, there are some pretty creative ways to show someone the
door. We looked to question-and-answer site Quora to find the most
creative euphemisms for layoffs. This is what respondents had to say.
Downright rude
It’s never easy to hear that
you’ve been let go, nor is it easy for most managers to be the bearer of
the bad news. But some have more tact than others.
“One of my
dad's friends said to a guy: ‘I don't know how this office would run
without you! But as of Monday, I'm going to find out’,” wrote Tracey Bryan.
Equally insensitive, wrote Richard Brasser,
is a line used periodically by a business owner he knows: “I had to
shoot another hostage today. The team was getting a little complacent.”
And when John Bagnall
lost his job at EMI Records, he was told, “ ‘We’ve decided your outlook
and talents are ideally suited to the freelance sector’,” he wrote.
Beware the dreaded “ized”
To
soften the blow, some managers avoid the dreaded “downsize” but use its
particular construction. Take “rightsized,” for example. “Rightsizing"
wrote Robert Rapplean,
is “a way of avoiding saying ‘downsizing.’ When the managers would hold
onto their jobs by laying off all of the actual workers, we would call
that ‘capsizing.’
Lorna Hughes
knows a friend who was “told she'd been let go because the company was
being ‘smartsized, which seem especially cruel,” she wrote. “Not only
are they firing you but they're telling you they're smart to do so.”
Richard Careaga
recalls he first “synergised” and then “graduated” when his company was
absorbed by a bigger player. “It was one of those all of a sudden
things where me and my 50,000 buddies were swallowed up by our new
250,000 friends,” he wrote. “In an organisation that big all you can
hope to control (at least temporarily) is headcount and for the most
part the guys at former [headquarters] were a bucket of unsorted spare
parts to unneeded machinery. Still, it stung.”
And when Nortel
Networks experienced mass layoffs in 2001, the company “did not
rightsize, downsize, or smartsize anyone,” wrote Troy Turner,
then a manager at the company. “Nortel ‘OPTIMISED’ 65,000 people!
(Yes, that included me and all my peers, our bosses, and even their
bosses, & their.... )”
Deciphering corporate jibberish
When in doubt as to what to say, some mangers just defer to corporate jargon. “My favourite,” wrote Andy Micone,
“was ‘realigning our resources to our corporate strategy.’ That's
right, they told people that they ‘weren't being laid off’ but were
simply ‘no longer in alignment.’ If you felt like a cog in a corporate
machine yesterday...”
Meanwhile, George Andre
said he’s heard a fair share of convoluted euphemisms, including
"recycling our creative pool,” “maximising our throughput by
streamlining our workforce” and “rethinking our future,” he wrote.
Out with a quack
Even
when employers try to be diplomatic, layoffs can foster home-grown
euphemisms, where the employees themselves coin a term for job cuts.
At
one Fortune 500 company, a manager was known for walking up to people
“seemingly at random and say ‘You doing anything this afternoon? I have
some stuff I want to chat with you about. Let’s go take a walk around
the duck pond,” Micone wrote. “We noticed people leaving to go for a
walk with this manager would never return. Soon the catch-phrase for
layoffs … was ‘a walk around the duck pond.’”
Courtesy: BBC Capital
The weirdest words ever used for sacking people?
Many people get their best ideas at unpredictable times, in the bathtub, driving home or sipping whiskey late at night in the office.
Being a new boss can be nervewracking. (McMillan Digital Art/Getty Images)
There’s no escaping it. At some point in any career,
you will probably be a boss for the first time… and you will undoubtedly make
some of the big mistakes that new supervisors inevitably make.
The key, of course, is to avoid some of the most
egregious missteps. Here’s how.
Time to take charge
"If you lose three nights of sleep, someone needs to go.
Ross
Cagan managed a team for the first time when he was in his thirties and
an assistant professor at Washington University School of Medicine in
St Louis, Missouri, in the US. Part of his job required supervising a
lab of a dozen students, postdoctoral fellows and technicians.
“Basically, they were betting their scientific careers on whether I was any good,” said Cagan.
He
remembers one especially problematic postdoc who was quite
confrontational with other members of the lab. Cagan struggled with how
to respond. “I stressed and hesitated,” said Cagan, who knew he should
discipline her. “I feared what the other lab members would feel.”
When Cagan finally acted, it turned out that everyone else was grateful. “[They] wondered why I took so long to do it.”
New
managers can feel as if it’s never the right time to make a big
statement or address an issue. Act too soon and people might think
you’re simply trying to exert your authority. Wait too long and you
could come off as weak and un-boss-like — or even ill-prepared for the
responsibility of supervising a team.
“If you lose three nights of
sleep, someone needs to go,” said Cagan of the lesson he learned about
stepping up to deal with a problematic worker right away.
Going to your head
On the other side of the coin is the manager who takes the ‘boss’ title too literally.
“As
the ‘person in charge’ new supervisors often fall back on preconceived
notions of what a boss is and try to lead by telling people what to do,
dominating decision making, micro-managing work, and serving as a
gatekeeper for information and communications,” wrote Jim Concelman,
vice-president of leadership development for global human resources
consulting firm Development Dimensions International, in an email.
Most
new supervisors are promoted because of specific technical or
subject-area abilities. They’ve got the expertise and knowledge to get
work done, said Concelman. “So new bosses make the mistake of relying on
the skills that made them great individual contributors, and miss the
opportunity to develop leadership skills,” he said.
Those who do
the best with the transition go through a “Copernican Revolution” of
sorts, according to Concelman. They come to recognise “that the universe
doesn’t revolve around them, but rather around the team” and “that
their success is dependent on the success of each member of the work
group so they focus on the team.”
The “I can do it myself” mentality
Attention new boss: if you think you can go it alone, you’re wrong.
Unfortunately,
thinking they can handle it all is a common mistake among newbies,
according to San Francisco Bay Area executive coach Joel Garfinkle. This
attitude is bound to fail, eventually.
To avoid this pitfall,
Garfinkle suggests identifying mentors who have experience managing.
“Ask them for support, feedback and guidance on a regular basis.”
Sometimes,
the best mentor can be a person outside of your organisation who can be
“a sounding board and a guide for you,” according to Dr Lorraine
Tilbury, founder of personal and professional development firm
HorsePower International based in France’s Loire Valley.
Finding
someone inside your company, however, “can help you understand the
‘unwritten rules’ and the management culture that exists in your
organisation,” wrote Tilbury who is also the vice president of mentoring
for the Global PWN (Professional Women’s Network) Federation. “Clarify
upfront with your mentor what your expectations are: frequency and
length of your meetings, topics you want to discuss.”
Decision paralysis
Doug
Tucker, managing director of Sales Commando, an international sales
training organisation based in London and the United Arab Emirates, has
seen many new managers freeze when it comes time to making decisions.
They are either fearful of making mistakes or don’t want to become
unpopular — or both, he said.
This behaviour only makes a bad
situation worse. “If you don't manage a situation, the situation will
always manage itself and often the outcome might not be what is
desired,” wrote Tucker, adding that some decision is always better than
no decision at all. “If it’s wrong, then back it up with your logic,
acknowledge it was wrong and learn from your mistake by not repeating
it.”
Above the rest
Finally, don’t forget that your job entails much more than just the management tasks.
“Many
first-time managers are excited about the position and want to be sure
they do everything possible to succeed,” wrote Connecticut-based Ben
Carpenter, author of The Bigs
and vice chairman of broker-dealer CRT Capital Group. “They remove
themselves from the production side of their job and devote themselves
entirely to managing.”
But this is a bad idea, Carpenter said. Instead, stay involved and be a player/coach as long as possible.
“Much
of one’s credibility within the company is derived from doing, not from
managing,” he said. Plus, your value will be higher and ability to find
work stronger if and when you decide to change companies. “It is easier
to quantify how much your personal efforts contribute to the whole.”
Courtesy of BBC Capital.
First time boss? Avoid these major sins
But those who juggle numerous work and family roles face an added obstacle, research shows: All the multitasking they do tends to block out new ideas.
Managing multiple tasks at the same time requires a lot of working memory and “executive control” – the ability to direct and focus your attention, says a 2010 study in the journal Intelligence. But working memory and the ability to focus actually work against the cognitive processes that generate light-bulb moments, says a 2012 study at the University of Illinois at Chicago.
“Too much focus can actually harm creative problem-solving,” preventing the diffuse, open thinking required to come up with new approaches and novel connections, the study says. Multitaskers may have to work harder than others to block out time for the daydreaming, exercise or mind-wandering that generate “aha moments,” the research suggests.
Dana Brownlee, a mother of two preschoolers and a corporate trainer and speaker, gets many of her best ideas jogging, showering or sleeping. Last fall, she knew she needed a light-bulb moment. She was feeling overwhelmed by all her roles – “wife, mother, entrepreneur, friend, sister, keynote speaker, consultant, corporate trainer, etc.,” says Ms. Brownlee, president of Professionalism Matters.
The solution was probably lurking in her subconscious mind, Ms. Brownlee says, but it didn’t emerge until she broke away to take a run. She frequently made contracts with her clients, defining boundaries and responsibilities, she says. And “as I started my jog, it just hit me almost like a bolt of lightning,” she says: “Stop and make a contract with yourself. Decide what you will do and what you won’t do, and let everything else go,” she says. She ran home and jotted down a five-point list of priorities that have guided her ever since, including “family trumps work” and “don’t sweat the small stuff.”
The list, which she calls “the Mommy Contract,” has helped her stick to a principle she believes in, she says: “First, decide what’s important. Then, live a life that reflects that.” Since she wrote it, she has been picking up her children, ages 4 and 18 months, from school almost every day; spending weekends with her family instead of running errands, and taking family vacation time every other month.
Why Multitasking Blocks Your Best Ideas
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