Have you “taken one for the team,” been “given the pink slip,” “eased out,” “reorganised,” “made redundant,” “axed,” or “invited to be successful elsewhere”? Call it what you will, they all point to one thing: “You’re sacked.”

Yep, there are some pretty creative ways to show someone the door. We looked to question-and-answer site Quora to find the most creative euphemisms for layoffs. This is what respondents had to say.

Downright rude

It’s never easy to hear that you’ve been let go, nor is it easy for most managers to be the bearer of the bad news. But some have more tact than others.

“One of my dad's friends said to a guy: ‘I don't know how this office would run without you! But as of Monday, I'm going to find out’,” wrote Tracey Bryan.

Equally insensitive, wrote Richard Brasser, is a line used periodically by a business owner he knows: “I had to shoot another hostage today. The team was getting a little complacent.”

And when John Bagnall lost his job at EMI Records, he was told, “ ‘We’ve decided your outlook and talents are ideally suited to the freelance sector’,” he wrote.

Beware the dreaded “ized”

To soften the blow, some managers avoid the dreaded “downsize” but use its particular construction. Take “rightsized,” for example. “Rightsizing" wrote Robert Rapplean, is “a way of avoiding saying ‘downsizing.’ When the managers would hold onto their jobs by laying off all of the actual workers, we would call that ‘capsizing.’

Lorna Hughes knows a friend who was “told she'd been let go because the company was being ‘smartsized, which seem especially cruel,” she wrote. “Not only are they firing you but they're telling you they're smart to do so.”

Richard Careaga recalls he first “synergised” and then “graduated” when his company was absorbed by a bigger player. “It was one of those all of a sudden things where me and my 50,000 buddies were swallowed up by our new 250,000 friends,” he wrote. “In an organisation that big all you can hope to control (at least temporarily) is headcount and for the most part the guys at former [headquarters] were a bucket of unsorted spare parts to unneeded machinery. Still, it stung.”

And when Nortel Networks experienced mass layoffs in 2001, the company “did not rightsize, downsize, or smartsize anyone,” wrote Troy Turner, then a manager at the company. “Nortel ‘OPTIMISED’ 65,000 people! (Yes, that included me and all my peers, our bosses, and even their bosses, & their.... )”

Deciphering corporate jibberish

When in doubt as to what to say, some mangers just defer to corporate jargon. “My favourite,” wrote Andy Micone, “was ‘realigning our resources to our corporate strategy.’ That's right, they told people that they ‘weren't being laid off’ but were simply ‘no longer in alignment.’ If you felt like a cog in a corporate machine yesterday...”

Meanwhile, George Andre said he’s heard a fair share of convoluted euphemisms, including "recycling our creative pool,” “maximising our throughput by streamlining our workforce” and “rethinking our future,” he wrote.

Out with a quack

Even when employers try to be diplomatic, layoffs can foster home-grown euphemisms, where the employees themselves coin a term for job cuts.

At one Fortune 500 company, a manager was known for walking up to people “seemingly at random and say ‘You doing anything this afternoon? I have some stuff I want to chat with you about. Let’s go take a walk around the duck pond,” Micone wrote. “We noticed people leaving to go for a walk with this manager would never return. Soon the catch-phrase for layoffs … was ‘a walk around the duck pond.’”

Courtesy: BBC Capital

The weirdest words ever used for sacking people?

Many people get their best ideas at unpredictable times, in the bathtub, driving home or sipping whiskey late at night in the office.

Being a new boss can be nervewracking. (McMillan Digital Art/Getty Images)

There’s no escaping it. At some point in any career, you will probably be a boss for the first time… and you will undoubtedly make some of the big mistakes that new supervisors inevitably make.

The key, of course, is to avoid some of the most egregious missteps. Here’s how.

Time to take charge

"If you lose three nights of sleep, someone needs to go. — Ross Cagan''

Ross Cagan managed a team for the first time when he was in his thirties and an assistant professor at Washington University School of Medicine in St Louis, Missouri, in the US. Part of his job required supervising a lab of a dozen students, postdoctoral fellows and technicians.

“Basically, they were betting their scientific careers on whether I was any good,” said Cagan.

He remembers one especially problematic postdoc who was quite confrontational with other members of the lab. Cagan struggled with how to respond. “I stressed and hesitated,” said Cagan, who knew he should discipline her. “I feared what the other lab members would feel.”

When Cagan finally acted, it turned out that everyone else was grateful. “[They] wondered why I took so long to do it.”

New managers can feel as if it’s never the right time to make a big statement or address an issue. Act too soon and people might think you’re simply trying to exert your authority. Wait too long and you could come off as weak and un-boss-like — or even ill-prepared for the responsibility of supervising a team.

“If you lose three nights of sleep, someone needs to go,” said Cagan of the lesson he learned about stepping up to deal with a problematic worker right away.

Going to your head

On the other side of the coin is the manager who takes the ‘boss’ title too literally.

“As the ‘person in charge’ new supervisors often fall back on preconceived notions of what a boss is and try to lead by telling people what to do, dominating decision making, micro-managing work, and serving as a gatekeeper for information and communications,” wrote Jim Concelman, vice-president of leadership development for global human resources consulting firm Development Dimensions International, in an email.

Most new supervisors are promoted because of specific technical or subject-area abilities. They’ve got the expertise and knowledge to get work done, said Concelman. “So new bosses make the mistake of relying on the skills that made them great individual contributors, and miss the opportunity to develop leadership skills,” he said.

Those who do the best with the transition go through a “Copernican Revolution” of sorts, according to Concelman. They come to recognise “that the universe doesn’t revolve around them, but rather around the team” and “that their success is dependent on the success of each member of the work group so they focus on the team.”

The “I can do it myself” mentality

Attention new boss: if you think you can go it alone, you’re wrong.

Unfortunately, thinking they can handle it all is a common mistake among newbies, according to San Francisco Bay Area executive coach Joel Garfinkle. This attitude is bound to fail, eventually.

To avoid this pitfall, Garfinkle suggests identifying mentors who have experience managing. “Ask them for support, feedback and guidance on a regular basis.”

Sometimes, the best mentor can be a person outside of your organisation who can be “a sounding board and a guide for you,” according to Dr Lorraine Tilbury, founder of personal and professional development firm HorsePower International based in France’s Loire Valley.

Finding someone inside your company, however, “can help you understand the ‘unwritten rules’ and the management culture that exists in your organisation,” wrote Tilbury who is also the vice president of mentoring for the Global PWN (Professional Women’s Network) Federation. “Clarify upfront with your mentor what your expectations are: frequency and length of your meetings, topics you want to discuss.”

Decision paralysis

Doug Tucker, managing director of Sales Commando, an international sales training organisation based in London and the United Arab Emirates, has seen many new managers freeze when it comes time to making decisions. They are either fearful of making mistakes or don’t want to become unpopular — or both, he said.

This behaviour only makes a bad situation worse. “If you don't manage a situation, the situation will always manage itself and often the outcome might not be what is desired,” wrote Tucker, adding that some decision is always better than no decision at all. “If it’s wrong, then back it up with your logic, acknowledge it was wrong and learn from your mistake by not repeating it.”

Above the rest

Finally, don’t forget that your job entails much more than just the management tasks.

“Many first-time managers are excited about the position and want to be sure they do everything possible to succeed,” wrote Connecticut-based Ben Carpenter, author of The Bigs and vice chairman of broker-dealer CRT Capital Group. “They remove themselves from the production side of their job and devote themselves entirely to managing.”

But this is a bad idea, Carpenter said. Instead, stay involved and be a player/coach as long as possible.

“Much of one’s credibility within the company is derived from doing, not from managing,” he said. Plus, your value will be higher and ability to find work stronger if and when you decide to change companies. “It is easier to quantify how much your personal efforts contribute to the whole.”

Courtesy of BBC Capital.

First time boss? Avoid these major sins

Many people get their best ideas at unpredictable times, in the bathtub, driving home or sipping whiskey late at night in the office.
But those who juggle numerous work and family roles face an added obstacle, research shows: All the multitasking they do tends to block out new ideas.
Managing multiple tasks at the same time requires a lot of working memory and “executive control” – the ability to direct and focus your attention, says a 2010 study in the journal Intelligence. But working memory and the ability to focus actually work against the cognitive processes that generate light-bulb moments, says a 2012 study at the University of Illinois at Chicago.
“Too much focus can actually harm creative problem-solving,” preventing the diffuse, open thinking required to come up with new approaches and novel connections, the study says. Multitaskers may have to work harder than others to block out time for the daydreaming, exercise or mind-wandering that generate “aha moments,” the research suggests.

Dana Brownlee, a mother of two preschoolers and a corporate trainer and speaker, gets many of her best ideas jogging, showering or sleeping. Last fall, she knew she needed a light-bulb moment. She was feeling overwhelmed by all her roles – “wife, mother, entrepreneur, friend, sister, keynote speaker, consultant, corporate trainer, etc.,” says Ms. Brownlee, president of Professionalism Matters.
The solution was probably lurking in her subconscious mind, Ms. Brownlee says, but it didn’t emerge until she broke away to take a run. She frequently made contracts with her clients, defining boundaries and responsibilities, she says. And “as I started my jog, it just hit me almost like a bolt of lightning,” she says: “Stop and make a contract with yourself. Decide what you will do and what you won’t do, and let everything else go,” she says. She ran home and jotted down a five-point list of priorities that have guided her ever since, including “family trumps work” and “don’t sweat the small stuff.”
The list, which she calls “the Mommy Contract,” has helped her stick to a principle she believes in, she says: “First, decide what’s important. Then, live a life that reflects that.” Since she wrote it, she has been picking up her children, ages 4 and 18 months, from school almost every day; spending weekends with her family instead of running errands, and taking family vacation time every other month.

By Sue Shellenbarger

Courtesy of the wall street journal

Why Multitasking Blocks Your Best Ideas

Working hard can win you acclaim and promotions. It can also hurt your health and family life. How do you know when to stop?

There are subtle differences between being a high performer and a workaholic. If free time leaves you feeling anxious or you are never satisfied with your work, you may just be working too hard.

Jullien Gordon, Founding Partner of New Higher
“High performance and workaholism look the same on the outside. They both look like hard work. The BIG DIFFERENCE is how the individual feels on the inside about who they are in relationship to their work,” wrote Gordon in his post High Performers vs Workaholics.

First, there is a difference between doing business and being busy. “A workaholics' No. 1 goal is to be busy,” wrote Gordon. “Workaholics fill any space in time with busy work because they feel insecure doing nothing. The insecurity comes from not knowing their value. They believe that the busier they are, the more important they must be.

High performers know when they have succeeded at a task or project. Workaholics, on the other hand, don’t know when to stop, Gordon explained. “A workaholic doesn't know what enough is,” he wrote. “I'm not good enough. This isn't good enough… they don't really know what success means to them.”
Gordon wrote that while high performers know their self-value, workaholics constantly rely on outside cues of validation. “They wait for external evaluations such as mid-year or annual reviews done by others to understand how well they are doing.”

Last but not least, Gordon claimed that workaholics can’t differentiate between what they can or cannot control. “A high performer focuses on their effort — inputs and outputs,” he wrote. This is quite different from someone who focuses only on the outcome and their income. “Their desire to compare leads them to judge themselves using common metrics of success which aren't always directly correlated to effort.”

Joel Peterson, Chairman of JetBlue Airways
Sometimes, the biggest challenge in being a workaholic is that you simply don’t know you are one. Peterson points out some signs in his post 10 Signs You’re Working Too Hard and How to Stop.
“An editor at the Chicago Sun-Times once said that he couldn’t take time off. He was afraid the place would fall apart without him — and he was terrified it wouldn’t,” wrote Peterson. “If you think the universe depends on you, you’re headed for a high-stress breakdown. Hire people who will do a better job than you ever could, and then celebrate their successes, get out of their way and recharge your batteries regularly.”
Another sign? “Your favorite phrase is ‘you’ve got mail’,” wrote Peterson. “Email… (is) a two-edged sword. If you’re disciplined, it’s a time-saver. But if your use of it goes unchecked, it morphs into a constant interrupter, a pestering reminder of all you’re having a hard time responding to. So turn off your email,” he advised.

If you’re always running late, this could also be a warning to slow down. “Make a commitment that you’ll be five minutes early to every meeting and every event… This will rarely reduce the quality of your thinking or your work, and it will usually help you re-frame your priorities and focus on your accountability and deliverables.” That way, you can take the mental break you need.
Another sign you’re a workaholic — and an annoying one at that: “You’re impossible to please. The food isn’t good enough, the hotel’s not convenient enough, your income isn’t high enough,” Peterson wrote. But there’s a solution. “Turn inward and change your mindset. One of my mantras… has become, ‘I have all I need’.”

Peterson also pointed out that most workaholics live in the past or future. “You reminisce, telling stories of past glories. Or you await the future, unable to really start living until a certain goal is behind you. Both of these are signals that you’re living outside the present, a habit that only leads to more stress.” Learning how to commit to the present is just as valuable as looking forward.

courtesy:BBC capital

Are you a workaholic? Or simply hard working?

Most of us, at some point in our careers, have experienced a bad boss. These terrors demoralise employees, walk around with an ego the size of Russia and make colleagues cringe as soon as they in the room or bellow down the hall.

Yet are these bosses truly ineffective managers? Perhaps the “bad boss” syndrome is merely a personality clash between the head of a team and the employee.

We turned to question-and-answer-site Quora for some advice on whether bad bosses exist. Here’s what some respondents had to say.

The power trip

“Oh, there are bad bosses. In fact, there are mostly bad bosses,” wrote Al Nelson. “They tend to be angry overbearing alphas or narcissistic overconfident alphas who lead by violence or charisma.”

Bad bosses exist because “most people can’t handle power,” added Robert Neville. “Some people can't handle even the tiniest fraction of power. It turns them into jerks.”

To be a good boss takes some character, Neville continued. “It doesn’t mean that you are perfect but that you have a few basic things like integrity, compassion and professionalism. Ultimately, the company reflects the personality of the person who runs it. If that person is a devious, conniving, arrogant jerk, you'll find that he produces a lot of bosses under him that are the same.”

Traits to watch for

So what defines a bad boss? Jeff Schaffzin offered a simple definition: “A bad boss is a boss who you can't stand working for (and chances are she or he feels the same way about you).”

Still ,there are certain personality traits that some employees find unacceptable, while others are unfazed. “For example: Is your boss a micromanager? For some people, they crave structure and someone to spoon feed them. Others (myself included) like having the ability to be given the opportunity to come up with my own solutions and show them off.

Is your boss a screamer? For some people (ones that definitely need some sort of therapy), that type of relationship means that the boss cares. For others, it's something that's deeply disturbing or downright frustrating.
Does your boss play favourites? If you aren’t on your boss’s golden list, sure it's annoying because chances are you won't be given what you need to do your job. However, for the ones who manage to get that honour (and I use that term loosely), you may feel empowered or even emboldened by that relationship.”

When you’re the bad boss

Not every boss is a good boss to everyone, said Ashwin Ramesh, who has hired hundreds of people and fired a bunch of them over the years. If you hate your company, chances are that you actually hate your boss, he said, admitting that he’s been called a bad boss before.

“If you have a boss that shouts, he sucks,” Ramesh said. “I used to be a shouter, but I'm no longer one. That's something I've learnt from the years. Shouting accomplishes nothing and all you're doing is making someone feel very bad. If your boss is a shouter, he's probably immature (like, I was), or worse still, has mental or personal problems.”

Ramesh defines a bad boss as “someone who:

Doesn't understand his team member's capabilities, strengths and weaknesses
Is too embroiled in satisfying his own personal ego and doesn't listen to subordinates
Doesn't believe in hiring smart team members”

“Bad bosses exist, and they are a major liability for companies” he added, “but by the time they’re discovered, it’s too late and companies have already lost a lot of great employees.”

Some may argue that “fear-driving bosses are good and that they push their teams to results (think Steve Jobs),” wrote Ross Matthews. “Tactics may include tight deadlines, unreasonable results and even threatening one’s job. However, the research says that these harsh methods of leadership may not be that effective. They lead to poor choices, lack of creativity and the expectation of a negative outcome.
“If you treat people like they’re doing a bad job, they’ll probably do a bad job,” Matthews concluded.

So what do you do?

According to Schaffzin, you have three choices: suck it up and accept it, quit or stand up to your boss and accept the ramifications.

You can also ask to be transferred to a different department within the company. “Pick a calmer beta, that is capable of creativity and introspection,” said Nelson “They have always been required to lead from a position of competence and ability.”

Neville agreed: “If you have the good fortune to be at one where there's a good leader, you'll find that the company is filled with good leaders. I believe that good leadership and the establishment of a good company culture is the secret ingredient behind a company that is wildly successful beyond all of the predictions.”

Courtesy of BBC.

Bad boss: Dealing with the terror at the top

Q. In office romances between a boss and a junior employee, what is the ethical line between a relationship based on mutual affection and attraction, and a coercive one where the superior has the power? Does it matter whether the boss and the employee are male or female?

Let’s dispel two myths about office romances: you can’t keep them a secret from colleagues, and there’s always a power dynamic when the two people involved aren’t peers. “In the end, truth will out,” Shakespeare wrote.

If it’s a coercive relationship, it surely violates the company’s policies and exposes the firm to a sexual-harassment lawsuit. But even if the employees involved are dating of their own free will, the one higher in the hierarchy will retain some measure of power, said Hilary Pearl, who runs Pearl Associates LLC, an executive coaching and organisational consulting firm, based in Old Greenwich, Connecticut, in the US.

Relationships that begin with affection and respect can end quite differently, with disastrous results. — Hilary Pearl

This can wreak havoc not only for the two people dating but also for their colleagues. Pearl tells the story of one female client whose male boss was having an office romance with a woman who was the client’s direct report. Of course the client found out about the relationship, which the pair had tried to keep secret. Then she started worrying about how she was expected to treat her own junior staffer, who was now the boss’s girlfriend.

“She saw what appeared to be favouritism in terms of the boss’s input into the more junior employee’s performance appraisal,” Pearl said. All this drama distracted her from focusing on her job, not to mention the fact that it left the company open to a discrimination lawsuit because of the boss’s behaviour.

Even worse: what happens when the couple breaks up? “Relationships that begin with affection and respect can end quite differently, with disastrous results,” Pearl noted.

Although Pearl says gender doesn’t change the ethical issues around office romances, she cautions that the woman may have more to lose. “Whether the superior or junior employee, the woman creates just one more barrier to tackle, and puts herself at further risk of hurting her personal brand and jeopardising her job security and career advancement,” she said.

Is that fair? No, but it’s the reality.

So how can one handle these challenges? Avoidance is the best rule. Try your hardest not to get involved romantically with others in your reporting line. If you do, think seriously about making a move to a different department or even another company. You’re in danger of damaging not only your own career, but also those of others in your workplace.

“Rarely does an office romance affect just the two people involved — it affects colleagues, the department, and the organisation especially if there is a reporting relationship,” Pearl said.

And if you’re stuck in a coercive relationship with a boss, that’s where the human resources department should get involved. Most companies have policies that prevent reprisals against employees who have been the target of a boss’s advances. Many companies forbid office romances, period.

"If there is a policy against relationships that have direct reporting (lines), then the employees involved in the relationship are guilty of violating their ethical and actual contract with the company to behave in a respectful, responsible, high integrity manner that upholds the company’s standards," Pearl said.

To comment on this story or anything else you have seen on BBC Capital, head over to our Facebook page or message us on Twitter.

Work Ethic is a twice-monthly column on BBC Capital in which we consider the ethical and interpersonal dilemmas that workers face around the world. We welcome knotty questions from readers at workethic@bbc.com

The truth about office romances

The real magic words in the workplace

Gregg Steinhafel, CEO of Target, says he is genuinely sorry that a corporate political donation upset the retailer’s gay and transgender employees.

Tim Armstrong, CEO of AOL, acknowledges to his staff that he made a mistake when he publicly fired an employee during a company conference call and apologises to the ousted individual.

Gordon Nixon, chief executive officer of Royal Bank of Canada, apologises for not being more sensitive to employees, whose jobs are being outsourced, and says they will be offered comparable positions within the bank.

To repair damaged relationships with employees, these executives decided to say two of the toughest words for many bosses to utter: “I’m sorry.” Such mea culpas seem to be more common these days, partly because of the growing likelihood of a public uproar on social media when companies slip up.

Whatever the motivating factor, contrition is good for more than just the soul. Apologies can help restore a manager's credibility after a damaging error, and they also can inspire greater trust in management at a time when many workers are feeling disillusioned with employers.

For example, about a third of UK employees characterise trust between them and senior management as weak, according to a study this year by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development, a human-resources organisation in London. Similarly, a global study by Forum Corp, a Boston-based consultancy, found that about one-third of workers trust business leaders less now than in the past. The managers in the survey were even more pessimistic: 43% said they believe employees trust bosses less now.

Honesty clearly is the cornerstone of trust, and that includes owning up to mistakes and apologising. Some respondents to the UK study said they would admire leaders if only they admitted their mistakes.

Beyond engendering trust, acknowledging an error and making amends can encourage greater openness throughout an organisation. “When leaders admit mistakes, its shows they’re human and vulnerable, and it makes it safe for others to talk about their mistakes, too,” said Dennis Reina, president of the Reina Trust Building Institute, a consulting firm based in Stowe, Vermont.

How common are apologies from bosses? It depends on whom you ask. Many employees believe managers don’t take responsibility for their screw-ups and don’t express regret. Only 19% of employees said their managers often or always apologise. But managers have quite different perceptions of their behaviour: 87% said they often or always say they’re sorry. But some managers said they don’t apologise because they don’t want to look weak or incompetent.

“When a leader makes a mistake like lying or taking credit for another employee’s idea and doesn’t apologise immediately, it begins to chip away at the trust the employee feels towards them,” said Andrew Graham, CEO of Forum. “This is true even if the employee observes this behaviour in his or her boss and isn’t the direct victim of the incident.”

Damaging omission

Failing to apologise can cause more damage than loss of trust. Reina recalled a client that had an employee who became extremely frustrated when his supervisor refused to apologise for “raking him over the coals in a team meeting.” In retaliation, he disclosed a customer’s proprietary information on the internet, which resulted in litigation and the loss of a $10 million contract, Reina said.

“Most times, people just say I’m out of here in such situations, but sometimes an employee is hurting so badly he wants to get even,” he said.

The refusal to ‘fess up to mistakes can poison the relationship between supervisors and their subordinates to such a degree that it may even contribute to depression. A study in Denmark found that it isn’t a burdensome workload, but rather feelings of injustice that lead to depression.

“An important element of what we call relational justice is when supervisors treat employees with consideration and truthfulness,” said Matias Brodsgaard Grynderup, a researcher who works in the public health department at the University of Copenhagen. Consequently, he believes admitting mistakes and apologising would make the workplace seem more just.

When to hold back

Of course, business leaders shouldn’t apologise for every misstep and risk appearing ineffectual and losing respect. “Bosses should focus on apologising for mistakes in which they were genuinely in the wrong and there was some type of business consequence,” Graham said.

It’s also wise to apologise clearly and sincerely — but concisely. After taking responsibility for the mistake and pledging to do better in the future, managers should move on and avoid dwelling on the issue.

Employers also shouldn’t expect apologies to work magic in every situation. They may not be very beneficial when office relationships were already badly strained before the mistake occurred.

“If the management enjoys high levels of trust from workers, then apologising is a good idea and more likely to be believed” and lead to forgiveness, said Jin Li, an assistant professor of management and strategy at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University, who has studied trust issues in the workplace.

“When the existing level of trust is low, apologising will be less effective, and its benefit is likely to be smaller than the cost of being perceived as weak and incompetent,” he said.

courtesy of bbc.com/capital
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